Saturday, January 22, 2005

Dirty Words and Sports

Ok, so my last enter was pretty serious so let's have some fun with this one. Is it just me, or do the inventors of all kind of sports have to be careful giving out names?

I'm not talking about those dumb jokes such as "a bi-athlete, he goes both ways." I mean real sports name that are just wrong on all levels. I have compiled a fairly short list of a feww dirty names in sports.

Snatch and the Clean and Jerk-I think Weight Lifting beats them all for the worst names. Who would name an event the "Clean and Jerk?" That isn't an olympic event, that sounds like some thing I do when I'm bored (hey, got nothing better to do). Snatch, I could use some, but it shouldn't be a weight lifting event.

Ball Players-Ok, this one is wrong on some many levels. Call them football players, baseball players or basketball players but not ball players(although I question the basketball player lol, just kidding b-ball players). Maybe baseball players tend to grab themselves but we don't need to hear about it.

"Hit it in the crotch"-FOR GOD SAKE NNNOOO!!!!! As much as I love curling (best sport on this planet as far as I'm concerned), I don't need to hear a skip yell this down the ice. Getting hit in the crotch is not a laughing matter, it really hurts.

Hole-in-one-Do I really need to explain this one?

Big Slick-No, it's not as bad as it sounds. Of those who don't know poker terminology, big slick is when you are holding an Ace and a King. It's not what you are thinking...get your head out of the gutter.

Nuts-I can leave this one to your imagination, but it isn't what you think. The nuts is when a player, in poker, has a hand that can't be beat (hence the name of this blog site). It's not...well, you get my dift.

Poker is actually really good material for dirty names. For instance, "flopping the nuts with big slick" is a player, holding ace-king, who can't be beat after the first three community cards. It's NOT giving Willie some fresh air.

If anyone can think of any other dirty names in sports, please leave a comment and let me know. I'm pretty sure I'm missing something.

Take'er easy everybody.

-Brother Punk-

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